The Frozen (2012)

232343564This is a movie I have never heard of until it recently popped up in my Netflix ‘suggestions for you’ section. (Not to be confused with the taut, exceptional thriller, Frozen (2010)).  I was skeptical due to its low rating on IMDb, but that has not stopped me before. Let’s be clear though- the real reason I watched this film is because it stars Noah Segan. I love Noah Segan and his horror movie role choices like Deadgirl, All About Evil, Someone’s Knocking at the Door, Cabin Fever 2, and Starry Eyes. Sure, they are all pretty much B-horror films but that is what Segan is good at- playing those smutty, scary roles with disturbing ease. Unfortunately, Segan is neither smutty nor scary in this role. But that isn’t his fault since he only has about five minutes of camera time (if that) for the entire sluggishly slow length of this boring-ass movie.

The Frozen is about Emma and Mike, a depthless couple, on a snowy adventure getaway. A snow mobile accident leaves Emma disoriented and confused. With Mike only vaguely worried about a concussion, Emma falls asleep only to be awakened by a vision of a ghost. Or maybe it is a dream? We aren’t sure yet. And then Emma sees “the hunter” (Segan), who never speaks, and disappears as suddenly as Emma’s ghost. When Mike disappears, Emma is left to fend for herself in this snowy, desolate location.23526093

If you are wondering where this film is going, that is a good question. Absolutely NOTHING happens until the final five minutes of the film with Noah Segan’s first and only speaking line. And even then, it is such a generic ‘been done before’ type of ending that it brings nothing new to the table. It reminds me of the same blasé feeling I had when I watched the humdrum Irish thriller, In Fear. This is just not a memorable film, lacking all empathizing value for the lead character. If I never wrote a review on this film, I probably would have forgotten everything about this aimless and unimaginative horror film. But I did write this review so you don’t have to suffer as I did.

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The Frozen (2012) on IMDb

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